Tuesday, October 25, 2011

What are your needs?

This has come up twice today. I have basic needs and as you all know i have desires.

But what do i need?

I'd like to one day feel comfortable with myself. completely at ease mind, body and soul. I'm not sure what that looks like or maybe that's just a dying wish.......I don't know what I need anymore. Too many wants and needs are mixed up in my head and I realize that I'm in a state of confusion as to what is important. I know material crap isn't important, but some of those things keep me sane. Like I want craft stuff so that I can make other stuff so that I can stay sane while trying to quit smoking. I need a healthier me, I need a saner me, but with that comes wants that I don't truly need. So all in all, I need to find comfort in being at peace with myself by myself and with myself. I don't like to rely on anyone for my happiness, because that's short lived-that is a want not a need. I hate going on multiple mental journey's. Quitting smoking has been hard and I'm not even fully off cigarettes. I feel like a failure, but I'm also dealing with counseling with my partner and now shit with my past that I'd rather keep trapped in my basement. It's unfortunate that that pain leaks out here and there and transforms itself into an ugly angry monster and it turns me into a cold and fearful person. ok where was i going with this.....

Needs are basic. I need to eat. I need to hydrate. I need to poop. I need to pee. I need shelter. I need to sleep. I need to work. I need to help the other things in my life that must be provided the above as well-such as animals and children. I also need to heal and I need to feel. I need to feel pain, pleasure, happy feelings, sad feelings...etc...I also need to feel centered and calm. Maybe it's ok to feel a bit out of control at times too....Life can't always be one flat line.

ok i need to stop here because i'm getting too serious. I did find this which i think is hilarious and must share with you...then i need to go. it's almost 1 o'clock and well i don't want to work on this all day....

The First Date:
The Exciting Phase:
The Comfortable Phase:
The Too Comfortable Phase:
The Decline:
The Breakup:
Getting back together:

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