And where the hell have you been???

You haven't written or called or anything....dammit. lol. just kidding. sorry i've been MIA, but I've had the most persistent and painful pinched nerve. My neck felt like i couldn't hold it up anymore and my arm radiated the most annoyingly painful ache i've ever felt in my life. Now, i feel a bit weak in my left hand, my arm feels very sore and my  neck is just poping like a firecracker. But I'm feeling better. Not fully myself yet though. Pain can really take a toll on  person. I've been very depressed by this and I hope none of my readers ever have to go through it.

• But here i am so let's start this week off. I am tired. lol. i know you so wanted to know that. i've been here for 40 minutes and people, i can take a nap. 
• Gonna go back on the quitting smoking bandwagon. I was so stressed with my neck that well smoking became my thing again.
• I went on a walk yesterday and realized quickly that I'm so OUT OF SHAPE! Two weeks of no exercise, little jaunts here and there taking Bella on a quick walk but holy cow, I took her out for 30 minutes or so and my ass feels like i should ice it. insert sad face here....
• I have been trying to access a government page for the last hour and it's not working. I think i may be the only person on earth who wants to kick a screen in when things like this happen. ok, i know i'm not the only one
• Holy crap. in less than a month i will be 35. oh shit. I must repeat the following mantra-I will not get depressed because I will be 35 with no children, house or marriage...keep repeating...keep repeating. hahahaha. it's funny sometimes i'm thankful for not having those things, not because i don't want them, but because it's a bit freeing. imagine if i had kids while i had a pinched nerve? and worrying about not being able to work and paying a mortgage and taking care of my marriage!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! the insanity. 
• Tell me one of these doesn't look appetizing right now.....

i am salivating.

• I think the internet has made me super cheap. I'm in love with some of the shoes on sole society, but i keep thinking i can get them elsewhere for cheaper. Paying 50 bucks for a pair of shoes is not bad, but i'm the type of girl that will run to payless when she needs something. Ok i know i don't do that all the time, but i have...oh my these shoes are tooo cute. they have animal print on them and i'm not a big fan of animal print, but the gray ones are super adorable and subtle. People what do i do!!!!??? shite. i really like them..i'm going for it people. early bday gift for me.
• So my anniversary was this weekend. There's been so much going on that it was nice to take a little time and do something together without thinking of the B.S. from the outside world. We're truly two lucky people, who found eachother four years ago under strange circumstances. We've grown so much and created an atmosphere together that is somewhat perfect. lol. nothing in life is perfect and there are times I am pretty sure we aren't too happy with eachother, but as a cumulative thing in a whole , i just gotta say wow. 
• I'm also getting a rifle. yup. i'm getting one. i think..lol. probably. we'll see if they bring in the Marlin today so I can see which one i like better (ruger or marlin). I got Gerry a dual rifle case. so his will definitely need a friend.
• Do you ever watch things happening in front of you and try your hardest not to say a word but realize that people are acting very strange and not like themselves? yeah, well i've seen that multiple times in the last couple of weeks and I'm starting to feel uncomfortable.
• I've gotta listen to some country....
• Also tired of hearing people complain about money. it's everywhere lately. There are ways to make more money....get a second job if you're in dire need of money. are you crafty? make stuff and sell on ebay or etsy.  Look online for ways to make more money, but dammit if i hear another person complain they better be prepared to hear "GET a second job." AYE. I remember my mom told me to get a second job years ago when i was working at a college and it was winter break. I couldn't believe they cut my hours in HALF. I also wanted to enjoy all this time off and my wage was pretty good BUT i wasn't making rent. Well, I went and waited tables 3 hours 3 times a week. It was fun. I made lots of tips and it really helped. My mom likes to make a better person out of me. That taught me a lot about myself too. I could take care of myself even if i lost my job or hours got cut in half. I think it also taught me how to rely on myself even more. Thanks mom. 
• Alrighty you get to stare at the pic of the croissant because that's the only pretty thing i'm leaving on here...have a great day.